Monday, March 29, 2010

Eureka, maybe.

Now. I guess why I’ve irrational fears of random people. But as I look closely, they don’t seem as random as I thought. They are all the same type of people, people I can’t figure out, people I can’t read like a book (well, not really, but you get what I mean).

Oh Jon, when will you stop trying to be such an annoooying know-it-all, =/. Not that I know all, but, well, trying to.

Let me tell you why these unpredictable (well, by me) people scare me:-

I’ve no idea how they will react to whatever I do. And that scares me, because I have a certain predisposition to expect the worst. So I’ll just clam up around these certain people and try to avoid them. Although, I’ve been trying to get over these fears =/. Failing much at it.

Also, I’ve no idea what their inclinations are like! I don’t know what to say so I won’t offend. No idea what they like discussing. No idea! Then I would just assume that we’ve nothing in common. Therefore, nothing to talk about meaningfully. There’s this person that seems annoyed and offended by whatever I said, even though I was trying my hardest to be nice and kind and not talk too much; he (yes, he!) completely baffles me. Why do I even try so hard some times. Blah.

Thirdly, as I’ve this fear of offending people that I know nothing about, I would stick to very very general topics. But most of the times, I won’t even know what general topic to speak bout. Awkward silence ensues. =/.

Lastly being with those people just makes me uncomfortable. I suspect self-confidence issues. Eep. Why oh why, Jon, do you have to read everyone? =/.

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The “wise” and “just” and “fair” Viann pronounced Nicole and me equally weird, and RUM! :P.

HOHOHOHo. NICOLE, WE ARE RUM!!! :P

Thursday, March 25, 2010

Hmmm.

I am often surprised how detached emotionally I can be --- I can’t really share in someone’s joy, or in someone’s sorrows, in someone’s pain or in someone’s hurt. It’s as if the emotion “switch” in me is flicked ‘off’. But that’s not to say I don’t experience any emotions, it’s just that my empathy just seems to have ran off.

Hnnn.

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A friend lost his dog today. Poor thing, he was so happy when he had it, just about a week ago. Then she became sick, very sick. The vet said that she can only be healed by a miracle.

So prayed for a miracle Contee and I did. Apparently, so did this friend, he really must’ve loved her very very much =/. But she passed on, anyway. Most probably to a better place.

But why? God didn’t answer our prayers. Or did he? A negative answer is still an answer, isn’t it? Most probably, God has a different plan for him. Or maybe God wants him to learn something. I know, so many maybe’s and probably’s. Why not just ask God :).

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Monday, March 22, 2010

“Gonna be, gonna be, gonna be alright!”

Gonna Be All Right – Hillsong London :).

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Time to give birthday presents to people who wouldn’t expect it >;D.

Or maybe I’m just a little too free, which I’m not. But what am I doing here. Eep!

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So, Jon is currently occupied with orders from people (about 10+ books already!). Didn’t really expect such a response, but, ah, maybe it’ll force me to  improve my bookbinding skills. Haha :). I really hope that this doesn’t make bookbinding something like a task I must do, but stay as a fun hobby that helps me earn :P.

More on bookbinding – Falkiners! Bookbinding supplies! Aaah! And it’s in London!! –hint hint, Sam! :P- But it’s so expensive. But then, I can increase my prices :P. But never mind, I shall make do with what I have in Ipooooh. Lalala.

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Freud vs. Jung. Who will win?!

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Pride

“…if you want to find out how proud you are, the easiest way is to ask yourself, ‘How much do I dislike it when other people snub me, or refuse to take notice of me, or shove their oar in, or patronise me, or show off?’.”

-C.S. Lewis, Mere Christianity

Ah. Pride, that nasty little thing that creeps in all the time --- pride in excelling in studies, pride in being good, pride in being in church, pride in being a Christian --- pride in being humble and having humility. It is certainly right to say that pride is the “utmost evil”, as Lewis and many other Christian teachers said. It is even the cause of the Devil’s existence.

It creeps in without being noticed, polluting your mind, influencing your thoughts, making you unloving. It even comes when you’re trying be do good, to be good.

I believe that only by focusing on God, that Pride can be defeated; being wholly dependant on God, and being aware of that, is the key to defeat Pride, to deliver that ass-kicking kick, that fatal blow.

So, let’s focus our thoughts, turn our eyes on Jesus, and as the song goes, ‘and the things of earth will grow strangely dim, in the light of his glory and grace’.

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Oh Uh Oh Uh Oh.

So, I did this :-

 

http://forum.lowyat.net/topic/1347381

 

Oh, dear. Let’s hope it’s not a mistake.

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Dilemma, yet again --- to go for ISCF (or as Abel calls it, LSCF) camp or noooooot?

I decided to just ask my parents and see if they let me go. I’ll go if they let me. Haha :).

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I want to get lost. I want to be someone else for a day. I want to be so engrossed in something I forget about everything else. Anything.

Just to keep myself busy.

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And, oh yeaaah. “Mere Christianity” bound! :D. It’s pretty. Hohoho.

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Currently reading “Persuasion” by Jane Austen, and “Mere Christianity” by C.S. Lewis. :)

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

So.

2 weeks of school. Then a week of holidays! Looking forward to it, as worship workshop will be held then :).

My parents planned a trip, too, to the Palace of the Golden Horses! Aaaah. I heard Dr. Mahatir lives there now. Huhuhu.

- - - ---- ---- - - - - - ----

I finished Pride and Prejudice again, 2nd time this time :). I’m sure I will reread it in the future, it is such a nice story. Go Jane Austen!

For those who don’t even know what the nonsense is “Pride and Prejudice”:-

It’s a book.

It’s a love story. (Albeit a long, and engaging one)

It is set in early 19th century England.

FKajsdkljaflajkf

Just read it.

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Sejarah Folio Element 1 to be completed by this week, handed up next week. Crazy quick!

I’m basing it on Chinese New Year. Anyone wants to share info with me? :P

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Sooo. “Mere Christianity” almost ready. Only covers remain incomplete.

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